I finally discovered something worse than being a Krelboyne: Being a male cheerleader.

I knew something was up with Reese. He just seemed different somehow, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Turns out he'd been showering...with soap. There had to be a logical explanation. Then, I caught him crying in the bathroom. I discovered the reason: Wendy. Reese liked this girl and didn't know what to do about it. I was torn between really, really wanting to make fun of him and actually feeling bad for the guy. I was surprised, but I found myself helping Reese. I told him he should find out what she likes and try to take an interest in it. So, the nimrod goes and joins the pep squad. I mean, girl cheerleaders are fine, but boy cheerleaders... That kid who's always smelling his hands is a cheerleader. 'Nuff said. Even the Krelboynes make fun of them. Plus, Reese sucked. He couldn't remember the routines. Unfortunately, I could, and Reese forced me to help him practice. I also suggested that maybe he should finally talk to Wendy. I guess that worked because she told Reese she liked him, right after Reese injured half the pep squad by knocking over their pyramid. Wherever Reese goes, pain seems to follow.

Speaking of girls, Dad gave us all this really weird talk about how we're going to be idiots around woman until we finally end up with someone like Mom. No. No way.